hen you venture into the world of online dating, it can be both exciting and overwhelming. There are so many possibilities! And there are so many possibilities. It’s hard to know where to start or how to begin sifting through them all. What should your criteria be for matches you pursue and matches you pass up?

The line between a good and a bad reason to pass on a match is often very fine. Below are a few common examples of each to help you navigate the dating pool.

Bad reason to pass up: He/she lives too far away

Long-distance relationships are certainly not ideal, easy or generally preferable, but they do have their advantages. Anyone who’s been in a successful long-distance relationship will tell you that, although the distance is challenging, it forces the couple to learn to communicate clearly and deeply, a skill many “local” couples lack or take longer to develop. Long-distance relationships also require greater creativity in the expression of affection, which again, though hard, can be a lot of fun and very rewarding for both people.

So unless you both feel that you are meant to stay where you are for the long haul, don’t rule out the possibility that God is drawing you into a long-distance relationship. It’s hard, sure; but all relationships are. If you’re looking for an easy relationship, unfortunately, geography is the least of your worries.

If you both feel called to be where you are, and if you do not sense the Lord leading you to a new city, then feel free to keep your online dating search local. But if either of you is willing to move, keep an open mind and heart to what God might want.

Good reason to pass up: We clearly have different values on critical matters

Religion. It should go without saying, but dating someone with a religious belief other than Christianity is simply not a good idea. Scripture instructs us not to be “yoked together with unbelievers” (2 Corinthians 6:14), meaning that we shouldn’t be inseparably linked in marriage to unbelievers. This verse also alludes to the words of Jesus: “Take my yoke upon you ... for my yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:29-30). Jesus talked about a spiritual exchange – our burden of sin (and death) for his life of righteousness. To affix oneself willingly to a person who has not traded death for life is not what God had in mind when he created marriage. And since dating often turns into marriage, it’s best not to even start that ball rolling.

Family. If you want to live next door to your family, and he is really more of a “major holiday family get-together” sort of person, you may run into problems. Or if she values family very highly, and you haven’t spoken to your siblings in a decade, one or both of you might find that you are not happy with the boundaries imposed by the other, whether the boundaries are too restrictive or too wide.

Kids. It may seem way too early to think about having kids when you’re just checking out a dating profile. But if you know you want to be a parent and the profile you’re checking out indicates that that person is dead-set against the idea, it’s probably best not to get into a relationship where you’ll be disappointed when you find that you can’t change that person’s mind.

How you deal with the idea of a blended family is up to you, but you should seek God’s guidance in deciding whether or not to get involved with someone who has kids from a previous relationship. There are a lot of variables to factor in. Make sure everyone’s on the same page before moving forward with a relationship where children are involved.

Preferred living situation. The old American TV sitcom, “Green Acres,” illustrates perfectly that some people are just not suited to certain lifestyles. This is more than a simple difference in preference or hobbies. Submit to God’s guidance, but also know yourself. If you go stir crazy in any city smaller than Los Angeles, and the other person would never dream of leaving Lizard Lick, N.C. (population: 1,300), then you can safely and amiably pass on that match.

Bad reason to pass up: We have different interests

Well then, you ought to have plenty to talk about. If you are compatible on an intellectual, personal and spiritual level, then a few differences in hobbies should just fuel the conversation and give you a lot of new and exciting things to do together as you introduce each other to your interests. Remember, you’re not looking for your twin; you’re looking for your complement.

Bad reason to pass up: There’s no photo / I am not attracted to the person based on the photo

Unfortunately, some people do not photograph well. And even more unfortunately, some people make poor decisions as to which photo(s) they choose to display online, if any. Do not be deterred by these things. Start getting to know the person. If you like someone's personality, try meeting in person. Physical attraction is certainly a catalyst in developing a new relationship, but it is not the most important thing. Furthermore, it’s not going to last. Whether he goes bald, she never loses the baby weight, or you buy food from a street vendor and then share a bathroom in Tijuana, at some point, you won’t be physically attracted to each other. So why base a relationship on attraction?

Good reason to pass up: We are completely (socially, intellectually, emotionally, spiritually) incompatible

If you love hosting parties at home and she suffers from a social anxiety disorder, or if you cannot hold a conversation without her getting confused, offended or angry, you might want to move on.

If differences in theology or orthopraxy are so different that they cause you to lose sight of Jesus in your efforts to prove yourself right, then you should definitely either learn to hold those things in an open hand while serving your partner, or allow each other to find someone else who will help you grow closer to God.

Above all, seek the Lord’s guidance in everything that you do, and remember that his reasons are the only reasons to pass up or to pursue a relationship with someone.